Anti-tank, Anti-bomb, Andy Burnham?

Dear readers — everyone and their mum is banging on about No.10 North (or, specifically, everyone at The Mill is banging on about No.10 North, and so are the stranger of our mums).

We know that by 2028 Burnham plans on moving his new Northern digs to Ancoats Central Retail Park (fka Gooseside DIY skatepark, fka Toys ‘R’ Us) but in the meantime it’s been reported that he’s looking for an interim spot.

But where will that be?

To answer that question we spoke to the biggest cheeses of Manchester’s development industry, and passing their ideas back and forth between them we managed to narrow it down to the four best options.

Tim Heatley (of Capital and Centric, friend of Burnham) told us that the ex-mayor “likes a conversion, upcycling is more rooted”, but penchant for a redbrick aside, the most important trait a new prime ministerial office should have is, ultimately, not allowing the prime minister to be blown up.

And so, having chosen our top four, we grilled said cheeses on two categories: security (one is bomb-proof, one has a moat) and ‘Burnham factor’ (is it, to borrow Heatley’s phrase, rooted?). Then we went around all of them ourselves to rate them on two more categories: lunch factor, and pub factor.

Here they are.

Heron House

Our first port of call is Heron House on Albert Square: a red brick in the front, glass in the back situation mere minutes from our office.

Likely the highest security building in Manchester, Heron House is the city’s spy HQ — the government’s intelligence and cyber agency GCHQ moved there in 2019. Some say it’s the only bomb-proof building in Manchester.

Like Burnham and his new no.10, GCHQ is expected to leave Heron House for the government’s new digital campus in Ancoats. The problem is that the campus isn’t expected to be completed until 2028, but Burnham could move into Heron House within short notice as an interim, seeing as it already meets the required security clearance. Whether or not it’s appropriate for the new prime minister to emerge from his offices directly onto Slug and Lettuce is up to him.

This could also, from a security perspective, be a bit of a downside. It isn’t quite common knowledge (beyond local government workers, journalists, and quangos) that GCHQ is located on Albert Square. Burnham taking an office there would bring a lot of attention.

Though the real downsides could be the afterwork pint options. As mentioned, Heron House also, amazingly, houses a Slug & Lettuce, which is not quite Burnham’s brand. We could just about imagine him on a Boddington’s at the Founder’s Hall, trying to “split the B”. He could also nip out the back and off to the Nag’s Head, which isn’t bad either.

But the lunch spots, oh boy. The £9 mega breakfast from Shirley’s Sandwich Bar? Pete Doherty-style photo-op heaven. Maray for some middle-eastern small plates? Ideal. Wings Chinese Restaurant? If it’s good enough for Rooney, it’s good enough for the prime minister. 

Security: 9/10

Burnham Factor: 7/10

Pubs: 5/10

Lunch: 8/10

We're 63 subscribers away from hitting our target!

If we can get to 4,500 Millers by the end of July, we'll be in a position to hire our next reporter. We'd love to have more writers covering food, music, and digging into investigations across Greater Manchester.

To do this, we need your support. Become a Miller today, and get up to twelve extra articles a month, plus the knowledge that you're supporting independent local journalism that matters to Manchester.

Help us hit our target!