Dear readers — goodbye, we’re quitting our jobs and working for Andy Burnham. You might think we’re joking, but do we not have outstanding communications and news judgement and a deep understanding of the media landscape?
Are we not in possession of excellent political judgement and the ability to translate political messaging into communications plans?
Because these are the criteria outlined in a job description for becoming the PM’s new No.10 North adviser. The job went live two days ago, and you’ve got six days left to apply, and indeed please do — because if one of us doesn’t get it, we’re going to want a mole on the inside.
But (as The Mill’s official motto now goes): enough about Burnham. Over the weekend we published not one but two weekend reads, both wildly popular in their own right.
On Saturday, part one of our investigation into the closure of Alderley Edge School for Girls – a prestigious fee paying school that once sat in leafy Cheshire and closed in June under mysterious circumstances – gained us a great slew of new sign ups (welcome!). Yes, technically, Alderley Edge is outside our remit, but this story was, as the parents themselves put it, too much of a Netflix drama to turn down. You can read it below, and keep an eye out for part two.

Then on Sunday, Jack Dulhanty wrote a sincerely moving piece on the closure of Trafford Park’s Kellogg’s plant — a factory that both his father and grandfather worked at for a total of 60 years. Thank you very much to everyone who left a comment — particularly those of you who worked at the factory too, or had family who did. Millsy, who is name checked in the piece, wrote on Instagram that it brought a tear to his eye; and Dan Bowen said this:

You can read the piece here.
And now on to our newsletter, which includes, among other things, The Mill going toe-to-toe with our imposter; a peculiar headline from the Bolton News; an update on Renaker; and trespassing with a man named Guy Shrubsole on Andy Burnham’s turf (we know, we know, enough about Burnham!!).
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The Mill v The Food Court Jester: Finale
Keen Mill readers (or indeed listeners) will already know that we have an impostor in our midst.

Last week, a mysterious figure going by the name Anguro created a fake Mill-style graphic, pretending we’d written a hit piece about TV host and online food reviewer Matty F White. The mock-Mill article was titled “Matty F White is a Food Court Jester!”, and it was posted on the Greater Manchester News Reddit page with the caption: “Any thoughts on this?”. To which White himself responded: “I have a few.”

As indeed did we. We contacted White to let him know there was no bad blood between us, and what resulted was an episode of our podcast in which Jack and Ophira discover the identity of our impostor live on air, and promise to punish him. We also read out White’s official response to his hater. You can (and should!) listen to that here.
Well, punish him we haven’t exactly. But we did manage to speak to him, and here is his response in full:
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