Britain doesn’t have a second city

A little-known law states that neither Birmingham nor Manchester are big enough

By David Rudlin

When asked whether Manchester was Britain’s ‘second city’, former council leader Richard Leese famously replied: “of course not” — and that he was happy for Birmingham and London to fight it out between them. Manchester, naturally, was second to no one (typical boosterism from a city that has never lacked in self-confidence).

The second city contest reared its head again recently, with Birmingham-born comedian Stewart Lee penning an article for the Observer. In it, he described Brummie’s fears of getting above themselves as one of the city’s ‘most endearing traits’. By contrast Manchester, he wrote, is ‘the city equivalent of an endlessly farting dog that expects nauseated passers-by to applaud’. I’m not sure about Birmingham’s fear of getting above itself: in my experience, it goes on and on about being the second city; Manchester, on the other hand, does not say it out loud, but that’s only because it thinks it to be so self- evident that it hardly needs stating.

But de…